For Science

Robert watched a fascinating YouTube video last week on the positive impact of both regular hugging and affectionate mothers to successful adulthood. As with many things he hears, he found a way to be nervous about this news.

"Mom," he asked, "does this mean you have to hug me more often? Because--no offense--but I'm just not a huggy sort of person."

I mulled over the question for moment. "I'm the same way, Robskers: I always love hugs from my floofs, but I'm not much of a hugger in general. But," I added with mock seriousness, "I think you might get some of the same benefits if I just tickle your feet regularly."

Robert conceded that this made sense, and ever since then he has been offering me his feet for tickles once or twice a day. For SCIENCE, people! I will not let him down because I care deeply about his success later in life.

Edward took a bit more convincing and was deeply skeptical when I told him later that day to come closer to where I was sitting to receive a karate chop for his health. He sarcastically informed me that he wasn't as stupid as I apparently thought he was.

Robert conveniently came in from outside at just that moment. (He had been in the back garden searching for roly-polies, as one does.) "No! It's science! Just ask Robert!" I cried out innocently. "Right, Flicklesnort? You were just watching a video on the scientific importance of receiving regular physical affection from mothers in order to be successful later in life?"

"Yes! And tickles," Robert agreed, more perfectly even than I'd hoped for, and Edward rolled his eyes heavily. Limply sticking out his arm in my direction, he told me to "go ahead and karate chop me, you weirdo" before he slunk off to do whatever angsty preteen thing was more worthy of his attention at the moment.

Just in case you're wondering, though, I do still give Robert at least one hug every evening before he goes to bed each night. You know. For science. Just in case.