In a Word? No!

"No!... No!... No!... No!..."

Robert, fresh from a long night's sleep, has awakened and greets the day with his favorite word. He's not sure what it means, exactly, but it makes a lovely, meditative mantra, and he yells it exuberantly throughout the day.

I said he doesn't know what it means "exactly," but that is not quite accurate: his powers of induction have helped him to uncover quite a few different meanings of the word.

Clue #1:

Me: "Edward, will you come here for a minute?"

Edward, running into the room, "No!"

~Robert has discovered that "no!" is a form of greeting, and often shouts it at me when he enters the room quickly.

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Clue #2

Me: "Okay, everyone, it's time to eat!"

Edward, as he is chased around the room and finally deposited into his chair: "No!"

~Robert has discovered that "no!" signifies readiness to eat. When I announce that breakfast/lunch/dinner is ready,  Robert runs to his chair eagerly, sits down, and cries out: "No!"

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Clues  #3 & 4

Robert pulls several books off the shelf before I notice.

Me, running over: "No, no, no, silly Robskers! Books belong on the shelves!"

Robert happily "drives" a toy car on the floor.

Edward, seeing [and, usually, grabbing] the car: "No, Robert! That's my car!"

~Robert has discovered that "no!" signifies a desire to play with a specific item -- and the intention to take it by force if necessary.

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Clue #5

Me: "Edward, d'you wanna bite?"

Edward, loudly: "No!"

Me: [eats bite]

Edward: "Yes want bite! Yes!"

Me: [looks guilty]

~Robert has discovered that "no!" indicates the need to have a taste of whatever Mom happens to be eating at the time.

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Clue #6

Edward: several times every single waking hour of the livelong day, every day: "No!"

~Robert has discovered that "no!" is the perfect word to babble to himself while at the grocery store, while looking at books, or whenever he's just chillaxin'. Hence his morning refrain for 10 or so minutes before he decides he's ready for someone to unleash him from the confines of his room.

In case, dear readers, you yourselves have not deduced from the above clues, "no" is also Edward's favorite word. Scratch that. His favorite word is "NO!!!" Whether or not he actually means no, it is his go-to answer for any question or situation that arises. NO!blesse oblige; you understand. Fortunately for me, his little brother also happens to be a parrot, meaning that I get to hear the dulcet, symphonic strains of this loveliest of negations ALL. THE. TIME.

This fact can be seen in more than just responses to questions. Case in point: Robert is learning parts of the face. He can point out your eye, nose, and mouth, and even knows the words for the last two of these. "no! ssssss" and "no! ffffff." Will it never end, dear readers? [Answer: No!]

But don't worry: if the negative karma gets to be too much to bear, I can just repeat my latest mantra to myself until the stress subsides:

"No... No... No... No..."


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Random, unrelated pictures, for those who desire them: